![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Entry tags:
And You'll Be Mine - DiexShinya, KaoruxToshiya, GacktxShinya - Dir en grey - 5/?
Title: And You'll Be Mine
Chapters: 5/?
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
melinen aka daishimel
Genre: romance, fluff and so on
Disclaimer: Not mine, and never will be
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: DiexShinya, slight KaoruxToshiya (a little GacktxShinya)
Synopsis: Shinya stared deeply into his own eyes. There was confusion there as well as uncertainty and he took a deep breath, trying to calm his mind and all the restless thoughts that were bouncing in his head. The reason why he was there in the first place, standing in front of that mirror in an empty restroom, was to try and rearrange his thoughts, to get the control over the situation back to himself. And there he was, feeling as bewildered as before with those two men.
Comments: Finally this chapter is ready. It took me some time because I realized that the last part of it was just not good so I ended up writing it again. I still don't think it's that good, but it has to do, I don't have the patience to write it again once more. And anyways, now I can finally get to the part I've been waiting to write ever since I started this fic. ^.^
And... Let's just agree that Gackt can dance in this fic, okay? ^^'
Dancing with Gackt was different than what Shinya had expected. Well, truth to be told he hadn’t really been expecting anything, he had been too busy to follow the other man to the crowd, fighting against the urge to look back to his friends to see Die’s reaction to his sudden disappearance. He felt a bit bad for the guitarist as he had promised to him to have fun with him, to let him entertain him, and now he had left like this, without even asking what the guitarist thought about it. Not that he would’ve needed to ask his permission or something, Shinya mentally scolded himself, but it would’ve been polite to at least look at the other man, to say to him that he would be right back. And he would, after this one dance with Gackt, the drummer told himself. He just needed time to think, to be apart from the redhead for a while. Gackt’s request had been a perfect way to fulfil that need. He and Die had, after all, spent the whole day together and they would spend the night together as well.
Gackt led Shinya to a bit more secluded spot inside the crowd and then placed his hands to Shinya’s waist. He gently guided the drummer’s hand around himself as well, drawing him closer to himself during the process. He held Shinya close as they began to dance; not too close to make the younger one uneasy but not too far to make the dancing difficult either. Gackt smiled at him and Shinya could only smile back.
After a while, Gackt broke the silence.
“Ne, Shinya-san?”
“Hai?”
“You seem a bit distant. Is everything okay? If I’m making you uneasy or something just let me know, okay?” His expression was serious and Shinya could see true concern on his face. The younger man smiled apologetically.
“Iie, I’m fine. It’s just that I’m not that much of a talker anyway,” he explained, secretly hiding the fact that he had, despite his earlier thoughts, been trying to catch a glimpse of his friends but with no luck, the crowd was too thick around the two of them.
“I sort of figured that out by myself already but I’m still relieved of not being the reason behind your silence. You fascinate me, Shinya-san, if you don’t mind me saying,” Gackt looked straight into his eyes. Shinya couldn’t break the eye contact with him even if he wanted to but he wasn’t sure if he did or not anyway.
“I don’t,” the drummer replied softly.
Gackt smiled at him. “When I saw you first time today I couldn’t get my eyes off of you. You didn’t see me though, you were with that redheaded man, what was his name again…” He seemed to be recalling it for a while the shrugged. “I really can’t remember it. I guess I was too amazed at your beauty, Shinya-san,” he said apologetically but the glint in his eyes told Shinya that he had meant what he had said.
The drummer knew that he was blushing, he could feel it, but he still didn’t feel the urge to withdraw from the other man’s hold. “His name is Die,” he said silently, not knowing what else to say.
“Oh yeah, Die.” Gackt’s lips curled to a small smile. “Nice nickname,” he said but his tone told Shinya that he didn’t really find it that nice. Or maybe Shinya was imagining things as the politeness of his voice was still there, he didn’t know or care at the moment.
“So, what is your relationship with him if that’s not too rude to ask? I couldn’t help to notice the way he was looking at you or how you two seemed so close. He sure didn’t look too happy when I took you away from him,” Gackt said lightly.
“Anou… He’s my friend and band mate, I guess we are pretty close,” Shinya explained, refusing to think about Die’s earlier behaviour. It was just his way of being; he didn’t really mean anything with it, right? And the most important thing, he himself had pushed aside all those kinds of feelings that he might have had and wasn’t going to think all that now.
“If you say so,” Gackt didn’t seem convinced.
“I do.”
“He still seemed jealous.”
“Jealous of what?” Shinya inquired.
“Of you of course,” Gackt smiled.
“Why would he be jealous of me?” the drummer tried to keep his voice nonchalant but failed; instead he sounded insecure even to his own ears.
Gackt leaned closer to the smaller man. “Maybe because you are the beautiful Shinya of Dir en grey.” He placed his lips close to Shinya’s ear, almost touching the skin but not quite. “And maybe because the way he looks at you is similar to the way I look at you,” he whispered.
Shinya swallowed, feeling the warm breath of the other man on his skin. He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but found himself unable to form any kind of reply to Gackt’s words. Then suddenly the song ended and another, slower one began. The older man withdrew a bit farther away from him but not before placing a light kiss on his cheek. Shinya felt his cheeks burn, he was sure they matched the colour of Die’s hair by now, and he blinked when he found Gackt observing him closely.
“You’re not going to leave me just yet, are you, Shinya-san,” he spoke softly, not taking his eyes off of Shinya’s. Mutely the younger one shook his head a little, it didn’t even occur to him to leave. He could only stand there, looking deeply in the other’s eyes, dazed.
The drummer didn’t say anything even when he felt the smiling Gackt drawing him back in his arms, this time so close that Shinya could feel the older man’s body close to his own but he didn’t protest. He only placed his chin on his shoulder, feeling Gackt’s arms around his waist, and he closed his eyes as he felt the calming rhythm of the other’s heart beat.
What Shinya didn’t notice however was his friends and Yoshiki standing next to the wall a bit farther away from the two of them, Kaoru and Toshiya close to Die who had his hands formed into fists, and an amused Yoshiki watching both the three members of Dir en grey and the dancing pair in turns, chuckling at the situation.
~
Shinya studied his mirror image, noticing the all too familiar faint blush on his cheeks. He sighed; it felt like all he ever did nowadays was blushing. It was starting to get irritating, but he couldn’t help it because of Die. And as if Die wasn’t enough, now there was Gackt as well to make him blush.
Ever since the second song Shinya and Gackt had been dancing ended and they had returned to Die and Yoshiki there had been this awkward atmosphere surrounding them. Or, rather surrounding Shinya, Die and Gackt since Yoshiki had been smiling knowingly at the three of them and leading their conversation with ease. Shinya had been mostly silent, standing there in the middle of the two men who had been more or less secretly – in Gackt’s case more and in Die’s case less – glaring at each other and trying their best to capture Shinya’s attention. It had been difficult for the drummer to divide his attention to the both of them and Yoshiki as well and politely refuse to leave their place with neither of them when they asked him to, saying that he wanted to wait for Kaoru and Toshiya and be with them as well.
Eventually Kaoru and Toshiya had returned to them and the atmosphere had turned to less awkward which Shinya had been extremely grateful for. He hadn’t been used to be the centre of the attention nor having two men fighting over him, because even Shinya himself had noticed that it had been exactly what Die and Gackt had been up to. So he had found himself moving closer to their bassist and leader as if hoping them to protect him from the other two men so he could clear up his thoughts. Not that he had been able to do it but it had been worth a try, Shinya reasoned as he leaned closer to the mirror, examining his mirror image even more closely.
After a while they had all moved to the bar and chosen a table there. Shinya had ended up sitting in the middle of Gackt and Die as he had predicted, and the same thing had continued, as he also had predicted. Gackt had been talking to him sweetly, politely addressing his words to the other members and Yoshiki as well whereas Die had been more sarcastic when speaking to Gackt. Shinya sighed remembering the situation. He never though it would happen to him, and he felt even more confused than before the party. All his earlier thoughts concerning Die’s behaviour, his own feelings and the fact that they had to share a bed for the next night seemed to double and get mixed with the new thoughts the night had awoken in his mind.
Gackt and Die had both been eager to buy him drinks and a bit reluctantly Shinya had allowed them, sipping his drinks as slowly as possible to prevent them buying them too much. He didn’t want to drink so much he’d end up losing control or something like that, no, that would be both foolish and thoughtless and Shinya knew that it wouldn’t be wise to drink much anyway. He needed to be sober to be able to handle the situation, that was for sure.
Shinya stared deeply into his own eyes. There was confusion there as well as uncertainty and he took a deep breath, trying to calm his mind and all the restless thoughts that were bouncing in his head. The reason why he was there in the first place, standing in front of that mirror in an empty restroom, was to try and rearrange his thoughts, to get the control over the situation back to himself. And there he was, feeling as bewildered as before with those two men.
Though Shinya had to admit that Gackt’s and Die’s little competition made him a bit amused as well. And he wasn’t the only one, he had noticed. Yoshiki of course was more than a little amused by that, he had actually said it out loud and stated that he would stay with them to see “who would win the little Shinya-san’s heart”. The drummer blushed deep red as he remembered those words and their producer’s teasing smile, he could still feel his gaze on himself as he had been cursing the fact that he couldn’t hide behind his hair as usually because of the hair-do he had chosen for the night. Shinya didn’t really know what to think about his idol’s words but Gackt had been exchanging smiles with Yoshiki and stated that it would give him great pleasure to try his best in order to fulfil that task. Which had led to Die declaring that he wouldn’t do nothing less than his best to win Gackt, of course. Shinya had only blushed.
After those declarations Shinya had felt more and more uneasy. His feelings had been a huge mess and he deliberately had chosen not to look at either of the men when they had both bought him roses from the girl who had been wandering around the hall selling them, only muttering his thanks to them when the roses had been handed to him. They were pretty roses, Shinya had admitted but still he didn’t know what it that they had been expecting from him was. Did they think he’d choose either of them and then… Shinya didn’t even know what would happen if he did! Nor did he know if he even wanted to do the choosing. Why was everything suddenly so complicated?
Shinya hadn’t been really sure of how much time had passed after that event but some time later Yoshiki had excused himself and left their company to announce the guests about the new number. What it was Shinya didn’t have a clue since that had been the moment he had chosen to escape. He had needed some time to himself and announcing the new number meant that most of the people would be in front of the stage. So he had as well excused himself and after an encounter with this man who had seen him heading to the men’s room and suggesting him to go to the ladies’ room instead Shinya had ended up where he was now, in front of the mirror in the ladies’ room. Luckily it was empty because the drummer wouldn’t feel comfortable being there if it was full of women. He could go to the men’s room, the man would probably have returned to the hall by now but he didn’t feel like it anymore. He only needed some place to clear up his mind and an empty ladies’ room would do the trick as well as some other room, he figured.
Finding a way to get his hands occupied Shinya opened his purse and searched for a lipstick he had taken with him. It was deep red, the same shade as his dress, and Shinya absent-mindedly played with it after adding some colour to his lips. What should he do now? His make-up seemed just fine and so did his hair-do, there were no loose strands of hair hanging anywhere, and he couldn’t find one single flaw in his appearance. So there was really no need for him to be there anymore. The drummer frowned. Was he done with his thinking? No, not really, but would it help if he stayed there longer? The answer was as clearly no.
Suddenly there was a small noise from the door. Curiously Shinya turned and saw a long woman in a blue dress approaching him. As the woman got closer however the drummer noticed that it was Toshiya.
“I thought I’d find you here, Shin-kun,” Toshiya greeted him, smiling widely.
Shinya blinked. “How did you know I’d be here?”
“Oh, I just figured that you wouldn’t want to run into Gackt-san or Die and since you do look like a woman you could use the ladies’ room,” the bassist explained as he took his place next to the drummer in front of the mirror and began searching something from his purse.
“Well, you got it partly right,” Shinya smiled. “I was actually heading to the men’s room but then this man advised that I should probably go here instead. I didn’t want to argue with him so I complied.”
Toshiya had found what he had been searching for and was now fixing his own make-up. “Oh, I see,” he said and eyed Shinya through the mirror. “Like I said, you do look like a woman.”
“But I’m not the only one,” the drummer grinned slightly.
Toshiya nodded. “Can’t argue with you about that,” he giggled a bit. “Anyway… I actually came to look for you,” he then said.
“Was I here too long?” Shinya asked, slightly worried.
“Iie, nothing like that,” Toshiya assured him. “I just thought this could be a perfect opportunity for us to talk. It’s not like we could do that there with the rest of them.”
“You’re right,” Shinya nodded as well. Toshiya was indeed right, he couldn’t possible think the two of them having a conversation there with Gackt and Die around them, at least not that kind of conversation the bassist usually had in mind.
Toshiya grinned. “I know. And I’ve wanted to ask you something ever since you came back to us with him.”
Shinya frowned a bit. “Then ask,” he said though he knew that what ever his excited looking band mate wanted to ask it would be something he might not want to answer.
“How is he, Gackt-san I mean? How was dancing with him? Is he good with his hands?”
“Toshiya!” Shinya exclaimed with burning cheeks.
“Nani?” the other smiled sweetly.
“You… you can’t just ask something like that!”
“Why not?” Toshiya asked blinking cutely.
“Because it’s not… it’s not well-mannered,” Shinya explained, sounding a bit frustrated.
“Mou, Shin-shin,” the bassist whined. “Why aren’t you telling me anything anymore?”
“But I am,” Shinya tried, “just not everything, you know. You’re not telling me everything about you and Kao-kun either, remember.”
“That’s only because you don’t want to listen to me,” Toshiya grinned. “I’d tell you everything, well at least almost everything but you’ve said it’s something that belongs only to me and him, remember,” he imitated Shinya’s tone, smiling teasingly.
“You’re impossible, Totchi, you really are,” Shinya sighed but smiled nonetheless.
Toshiya beamed at him. “And that’s why you like me so.”
“Yeah, that’s why,” the drummer muttered, recalling Die’s earlier words that had been very similar to Toshiya’s.
“Well then, how about Die?” Toshiya suddenly asked casually.
“Nani?” Shinya blinked.
“How is he like?” the bassist asked, clearly amused.
Shinya blinked again. And again. He tried to say something but it felt like he had lost his ability to speak. “How do you think I would know that?” he finally managed to choke out.
Toshiya lifted his eyebrow. “Because it’s so obvious,” he stated it as a fact.
“What is?” Shinya inquired, puzzled.
“That you love him and he loves you.”
For a moment Shinya was totally speechless. He didn’t know what to say or what to think. Why did Toshiya say it? Was he just teasing him? He had to. Shinya had been hiding his own feelings well, he knew it, so his friend had to be only teasing him and nothing more. He chewed on his lower lip. Maybe he should suggest that they should go already. The others might be wondering where they were. Yeah, that was what he should do.
“Anou… I think we should return to the others,” Shinya finally opened his mouth.
Toshiya eyed him curiously before nodding. “Maybe we should,” he only said then turned to go. “Are you coming?” he added when he noticed that Shinya hadn’t moved.
“Hai,” the drummer answered silently and after one last glance to the mirror followed him to the door.
Chapters: 5/?
Author:
melinen aka daishimelGenre: romance, fluff and so on
Disclaimer: Not mine, and never will be
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: DiexShinya, slight KaoruxToshiya (a little GacktxShinya)
Synopsis: Shinya stared deeply into his own eyes. There was confusion there as well as uncertainty and he took a deep breath, trying to calm his mind and all the restless thoughts that were bouncing in his head. The reason why he was there in the first place, standing in front of that mirror in an empty restroom, was to try and rearrange his thoughts, to get the control over the situation back to himself. And there he was, feeling as bewildered as before with those two men.
Comments: Finally this chapter is ready. It took me some time because I realized that the last part of it was just not good so I ended up writing it again. I still don't think it's that good, but it has to do, I don't have the patience to write it again once more. And anyways, now I can finally get to the part I've been waiting to write ever since I started this fic. ^.^
And... Let's just agree that Gackt can dance in this fic, okay? ^^'
Dancing with Gackt was different than what Shinya had expected. Well, truth to be told he hadn’t really been expecting anything, he had been too busy to follow the other man to the crowd, fighting against the urge to look back to his friends to see Die’s reaction to his sudden disappearance. He felt a bit bad for the guitarist as he had promised to him to have fun with him, to let him entertain him, and now he had left like this, without even asking what the guitarist thought about it. Not that he would’ve needed to ask his permission or something, Shinya mentally scolded himself, but it would’ve been polite to at least look at the other man, to say to him that he would be right back. And he would, after this one dance with Gackt, the drummer told himself. He just needed time to think, to be apart from the redhead for a while. Gackt’s request had been a perfect way to fulfil that need. He and Die had, after all, spent the whole day together and they would spend the night together as well.
Gackt led Shinya to a bit more secluded spot inside the crowd and then placed his hands to Shinya’s waist. He gently guided the drummer’s hand around himself as well, drawing him closer to himself during the process. He held Shinya close as they began to dance; not too close to make the younger one uneasy but not too far to make the dancing difficult either. Gackt smiled at him and Shinya could only smile back.
After a while, Gackt broke the silence.
“Ne, Shinya-san?”
“Hai?”
“You seem a bit distant. Is everything okay? If I’m making you uneasy or something just let me know, okay?” His expression was serious and Shinya could see true concern on his face. The younger man smiled apologetically.
“Iie, I’m fine. It’s just that I’m not that much of a talker anyway,” he explained, secretly hiding the fact that he had, despite his earlier thoughts, been trying to catch a glimpse of his friends but with no luck, the crowd was too thick around the two of them.
“I sort of figured that out by myself already but I’m still relieved of not being the reason behind your silence. You fascinate me, Shinya-san, if you don’t mind me saying,” Gackt looked straight into his eyes. Shinya couldn’t break the eye contact with him even if he wanted to but he wasn’t sure if he did or not anyway.
“I don’t,” the drummer replied softly.
Gackt smiled at him. “When I saw you first time today I couldn’t get my eyes off of you. You didn’t see me though, you were with that redheaded man, what was his name again…” He seemed to be recalling it for a while the shrugged. “I really can’t remember it. I guess I was too amazed at your beauty, Shinya-san,” he said apologetically but the glint in his eyes told Shinya that he had meant what he had said.
The drummer knew that he was blushing, he could feel it, but he still didn’t feel the urge to withdraw from the other man’s hold. “His name is Die,” he said silently, not knowing what else to say.
“Oh yeah, Die.” Gackt’s lips curled to a small smile. “Nice nickname,” he said but his tone told Shinya that he didn’t really find it that nice. Or maybe Shinya was imagining things as the politeness of his voice was still there, he didn’t know or care at the moment.
“So, what is your relationship with him if that’s not too rude to ask? I couldn’t help to notice the way he was looking at you or how you two seemed so close. He sure didn’t look too happy when I took you away from him,” Gackt said lightly.
“Anou… He’s my friend and band mate, I guess we are pretty close,” Shinya explained, refusing to think about Die’s earlier behaviour. It was just his way of being; he didn’t really mean anything with it, right? And the most important thing, he himself had pushed aside all those kinds of feelings that he might have had and wasn’t going to think all that now.
“If you say so,” Gackt didn’t seem convinced.
“I do.”
“He still seemed jealous.”
“Jealous of what?” Shinya inquired.
“Of you of course,” Gackt smiled.
“Why would he be jealous of me?” the drummer tried to keep his voice nonchalant but failed; instead he sounded insecure even to his own ears.
Gackt leaned closer to the smaller man. “Maybe because you are the beautiful Shinya of Dir en grey.” He placed his lips close to Shinya’s ear, almost touching the skin but not quite. “And maybe because the way he looks at you is similar to the way I look at you,” he whispered.
Shinya swallowed, feeling the warm breath of the other man on his skin. He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but found himself unable to form any kind of reply to Gackt’s words. Then suddenly the song ended and another, slower one began. The older man withdrew a bit farther away from him but not before placing a light kiss on his cheek. Shinya felt his cheeks burn, he was sure they matched the colour of Die’s hair by now, and he blinked when he found Gackt observing him closely.
“You’re not going to leave me just yet, are you, Shinya-san,” he spoke softly, not taking his eyes off of Shinya’s. Mutely the younger one shook his head a little, it didn’t even occur to him to leave. He could only stand there, looking deeply in the other’s eyes, dazed.
The drummer didn’t say anything even when he felt the smiling Gackt drawing him back in his arms, this time so close that Shinya could feel the older man’s body close to his own but he didn’t protest. He only placed his chin on his shoulder, feeling Gackt’s arms around his waist, and he closed his eyes as he felt the calming rhythm of the other’s heart beat.
What Shinya didn’t notice however was his friends and Yoshiki standing next to the wall a bit farther away from the two of them, Kaoru and Toshiya close to Die who had his hands formed into fists, and an amused Yoshiki watching both the three members of Dir en grey and the dancing pair in turns, chuckling at the situation.
~
Shinya studied his mirror image, noticing the all too familiar faint blush on his cheeks. He sighed; it felt like all he ever did nowadays was blushing. It was starting to get irritating, but he couldn’t help it because of Die. And as if Die wasn’t enough, now there was Gackt as well to make him blush.
Ever since the second song Shinya and Gackt had been dancing ended and they had returned to Die and Yoshiki there had been this awkward atmosphere surrounding them. Or, rather surrounding Shinya, Die and Gackt since Yoshiki had been smiling knowingly at the three of them and leading their conversation with ease. Shinya had been mostly silent, standing there in the middle of the two men who had been more or less secretly – in Gackt’s case more and in Die’s case less – glaring at each other and trying their best to capture Shinya’s attention. It had been difficult for the drummer to divide his attention to the both of them and Yoshiki as well and politely refuse to leave their place with neither of them when they asked him to, saying that he wanted to wait for Kaoru and Toshiya and be with them as well.
Eventually Kaoru and Toshiya had returned to them and the atmosphere had turned to less awkward which Shinya had been extremely grateful for. He hadn’t been used to be the centre of the attention nor having two men fighting over him, because even Shinya himself had noticed that it had been exactly what Die and Gackt had been up to. So he had found himself moving closer to their bassist and leader as if hoping them to protect him from the other two men so he could clear up his thoughts. Not that he had been able to do it but it had been worth a try, Shinya reasoned as he leaned closer to the mirror, examining his mirror image even more closely.
After a while they had all moved to the bar and chosen a table there. Shinya had ended up sitting in the middle of Gackt and Die as he had predicted, and the same thing had continued, as he also had predicted. Gackt had been talking to him sweetly, politely addressing his words to the other members and Yoshiki as well whereas Die had been more sarcastic when speaking to Gackt. Shinya sighed remembering the situation. He never though it would happen to him, and he felt even more confused than before the party. All his earlier thoughts concerning Die’s behaviour, his own feelings and the fact that they had to share a bed for the next night seemed to double and get mixed with the new thoughts the night had awoken in his mind.
Gackt and Die had both been eager to buy him drinks and a bit reluctantly Shinya had allowed them, sipping his drinks as slowly as possible to prevent them buying them too much. He didn’t want to drink so much he’d end up losing control or something like that, no, that would be both foolish and thoughtless and Shinya knew that it wouldn’t be wise to drink much anyway. He needed to be sober to be able to handle the situation, that was for sure.
Shinya stared deeply into his own eyes. There was confusion there as well as uncertainty and he took a deep breath, trying to calm his mind and all the restless thoughts that were bouncing in his head. The reason why he was there in the first place, standing in front of that mirror in an empty restroom, was to try and rearrange his thoughts, to get the control over the situation back to himself. And there he was, feeling as bewildered as before with those two men.
Though Shinya had to admit that Gackt’s and Die’s little competition made him a bit amused as well. And he wasn’t the only one, he had noticed. Yoshiki of course was more than a little amused by that, he had actually said it out loud and stated that he would stay with them to see “who would win the little Shinya-san’s heart”. The drummer blushed deep red as he remembered those words and their producer’s teasing smile, he could still feel his gaze on himself as he had been cursing the fact that he couldn’t hide behind his hair as usually because of the hair-do he had chosen for the night. Shinya didn’t really know what to think about his idol’s words but Gackt had been exchanging smiles with Yoshiki and stated that it would give him great pleasure to try his best in order to fulfil that task. Which had led to Die declaring that he wouldn’t do nothing less than his best to win Gackt, of course. Shinya had only blushed.
After those declarations Shinya had felt more and more uneasy. His feelings had been a huge mess and he deliberately had chosen not to look at either of the men when they had both bought him roses from the girl who had been wandering around the hall selling them, only muttering his thanks to them when the roses had been handed to him. They were pretty roses, Shinya had admitted but still he didn’t know what it that they had been expecting from him was. Did they think he’d choose either of them and then… Shinya didn’t even know what would happen if he did! Nor did he know if he even wanted to do the choosing. Why was everything suddenly so complicated?
Shinya hadn’t been really sure of how much time had passed after that event but some time later Yoshiki had excused himself and left their company to announce the guests about the new number. What it was Shinya didn’t have a clue since that had been the moment he had chosen to escape. He had needed some time to himself and announcing the new number meant that most of the people would be in front of the stage. So he had as well excused himself and after an encounter with this man who had seen him heading to the men’s room and suggesting him to go to the ladies’ room instead Shinya had ended up where he was now, in front of the mirror in the ladies’ room. Luckily it was empty because the drummer wouldn’t feel comfortable being there if it was full of women. He could go to the men’s room, the man would probably have returned to the hall by now but he didn’t feel like it anymore. He only needed some place to clear up his mind and an empty ladies’ room would do the trick as well as some other room, he figured.
Finding a way to get his hands occupied Shinya opened his purse and searched for a lipstick he had taken with him. It was deep red, the same shade as his dress, and Shinya absent-mindedly played with it after adding some colour to his lips. What should he do now? His make-up seemed just fine and so did his hair-do, there were no loose strands of hair hanging anywhere, and he couldn’t find one single flaw in his appearance. So there was really no need for him to be there anymore. The drummer frowned. Was he done with his thinking? No, not really, but would it help if he stayed there longer? The answer was as clearly no.
Suddenly there was a small noise from the door. Curiously Shinya turned and saw a long woman in a blue dress approaching him. As the woman got closer however the drummer noticed that it was Toshiya.
“I thought I’d find you here, Shin-kun,” Toshiya greeted him, smiling widely.
Shinya blinked. “How did you know I’d be here?”
“Oh, I just figured that you wouldn’t want to run into Gackt-san or Die and since you do look like a woman you could use the ladies’ room,” the bassist explained as he took his place next to the drummer in front of the mirror and began searching something from his purse.
“Well, you got it partly right,” Shinya smiled. “I was actually heading to the men’s room but then this man advised that I should probably go here instead. I didn’t want to argue with him so I complied.”
Toshiya had found what he had been searching for and was now fixing his own make-up. “Oh, I see,” he said and eyed Shinya through the mirror. “Like I said, you do look like a woman.”
“But I’m not the only one,” the drummer grinned slightly.
Toshiya nodded. “Can’t argue with you about that,” he giggled a bit. “Anyway… I actually came to look for you,” he then said.
“Was I here too long?” Shinya asked, slightly worried.
“Iie, nothing like that,” Toshiya assured him. “I just thought this could be a perfect opportunity for us to talk. It’s not like we could do that there with the rest of them.”
“You’re right,” Shinya nodded as well. Toshiya was indeed right, he couldn’t possible think the two of them having a conversation there with Gackt and Die around them, at least not that kind of conversation the bassist usually had in mind.
Toshiya grinned. “I know. And I’ve wanted to ask you something ever since you came back to us with him.”
Shinya frowned a bit. “Then ask,” he said though he knew that what ever his excited looking band mate wanted to ask it would be something he might not want to answer.
“How is he, Gackt-san I mean? How was dancing with him? Is he good with his hands?”
“Toshiya!” Shinya exclaimed with burning cheeks.
“Nani?” the other smiled sweetly.
“You… you can’t just ask something like that!”
“Why not?” Toshiya asked blinking cutely.
“Because it’s not… it’s not well-mannered,” Shinya explained, sounding a bit frustrated.
“Mou, Shin-shin,” the bassist whined. “Why aren’t you telling me anything anymore?”
“But I am,” Shinya tried, “just not everything, you know. You’re not telling me everything about you and Kao-kun either, remember.”
“That’s only because you don’t want to listen to me,” Toshiya grinned. “I’d tell you everything, well at least almost everything but you’ve said it’s something that belongs only to me and him, remember,” he imitated Shinya’s tone, smiling teasingly.
“You’re impossible, Totchi, you really are,” Shinya sighed but smiled nonetheless.
Toshiya beamed at him. “And that’s why you like me so.”
“Yeah, that’s why,” the drummer muttered, recalling Die’s earlier words that had been very similar to Toshiya’s.
“Well then, how about Die?” Toshiya suddenly asked casually.
“Nani?” Shinya blinked.
“How is he like?” the bassist asked, clearly amused.
Shinya blinked again. And again. He tried to say something but it felt like he had lost his ability to speak. “How do you think I would know that?” he finally managed to choke out.
Toshiya lifted his eyebrow. “Because it’s so obvious,” he stated it as a fact.
“What is?” Shinya inquired, puzzled.
“That you love him and he loves you.”
For a moment Shinya was totally speechless. He didn’t know what to say or what to think. Why did Toshiya say it? Was he just teasing him? He had to. Shinya had been hiding his own feelings well, he knew it, so his friend had to be only teasing him and nothing more. He chewed on his lower lip. Maybe he should suggest that they should go already. The others might be wondering where they were. Yeah, that was what he should do.
“Anou… I think we should return to the others,” Shinya finally opened his mouth.
Toshiya eyed him curiously before nodding. “Maybe we should,” he only said then turned to go. “Are you coming?” he added when he noticed that Shinya hadn’t moved.
“Hai,” the drummer answered silently and after one last glance to the mirror followed him to the door.